Welcome to My Story

I hope this can be a place of sharing and healing. I want to share my struggles and surprises on this journey. I want to help you find healing like I did by relying on my faith and pursuing my dream of writing a children's book. Maddy and Scooter: Unlikely Friends is not only my book, but an action response to my grief. I hope you can give birth to your dream!

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

What to Say to Your Man About Infertility

It is hard for most men to understand this process and what we go through on a daily basis. Forget infertility... how about PMS, menopause and everything in between? I always say to Andy I just wish you could walk in my shoes for only one day! That is all it would take! He is extremely understanding and supportive as you may know from my other blog posts. I couldn't ask for more from him. Some don't have it so easy. Recently, a man (not my husband) said to me that I just need to focus my mind harder on having a baby. He explained it is all in my mind and the mind controls the body, etc. I just started sobbing. If only he realized how much of my mind does focus on this. In his defense, he was trying to be helpful and perhaps didn't know how much I think about this daily. My mother-n-law, who is very wise, explained it best like this, telling a woman to "just think about it and focus" is like telling a man he can no longer have sex and not to think about it. Just relax and focus and it will happen...but it doesn't. Would that be torture for your man? Welcome to my world. Relax, sure. Focus, okay. Just let go and it will happen...trying. Perhaps use this analogy for your partner to understand a glimpse of what you are experiencing.

Also, here is a good article where Bill Rancic of The Apprentice fame discusses his struggles with infertility that he and his wife Guiliana Rancic from E! News face and how they deal with the issue.

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